It is always hard to hear the doctor say words like, "I can say with relative certainty that 100 percent recovery is out of the question at this point. Her vitals are good, her statistics are where we would want them to be, but her clinical exam is just not improving as we had hoped." Her brain is looking much better, it is back in a proper position, still swelling on the left, but centered overall. The bloodflow is good, which is encouraging. Each doctor that came in today reminded me that this can still go either way. We still have a couple of days before peak swelling is over. There are improvements though.
In the night while the nurse was suctioning her lungs thru her breathing tube, Holland reached for her hand to stop her. This morning, she opened her eyes just a little bit, but on her own. She has done it twice today. Upon exam, the doctor said that her eyes are "yolked" today, that means they are tracking together when they open her eye lids. Before, they were just individually "there" and no controlled movement. Thankfully, the swelling in her face is significantly reduced. Yesterday she was so swollen that I can't imagine it would be easy to open her eyes, even if she wanted to. After an exam today, I put my hand in hers and as I did, her fingers wrapped around my hand. This was a first, as well.
Last night they did an endoscopy to see if she had a tear in her esophagus. There has been air escaping into her collar bone area on the other side of the tube where they put it in her side to drain excess air on the left side. They found she had a small tear right where the esophagus connects to the stomach that was now sealing over again, but there is concern that if air escaped, what else might have escaped as she was throwing up unconscious on the scene of the accident. They just took her for a ct scan on her chest to see if there is anything to worry that would cause infection somewhere else. Now we wait for more results.
I finally slept 5 hours last night. It is the first time I have slept that much since this started. I know I have been sustained with power beyond my own because I don't function well on little sleep. It may seem like a small thing to some, but to me, the fact that I have been able to be here, on my feet and managing so many issues on so little sleep is a miracle. I am grateful for all who are praying for us all on this journey with Holland.